John Gramila is…a guy. We like him, and thought he had good advice. So he wrote this. Enjoy!
Online dating can be difficult, but those nervous flutters can be put to good use. Stay calm, be confident, follow this advice, and someone will love you eventually.
Prepare for your date well in advance. Dress in a style appropriate for the times. You want to severely impress, but not overshadow, your future life-mate. Arrive early, get a sense of the area’s energy, and position yourself in a comfortable spot near potential allies.Avoid eye contact to prove you’re not creepy. Once you’ve mastered your eyes, it’s important to rely on your words. Online dating has expanded the dating pool from plenty of fish to millions of people. You can’t stand out by being ordinary and polite. Stand out by being best in your field. Your unemployment does not matter if you’re the best at being unemployed.
Prepare questions beforehand, and write them on notecards. If you become nervous, hand your date a question and non-verbally request an answer. Ask about their living situation. When conversation idles, mention the weather. Everyone has an opinion about the weather, and opinions are often surprising. You might discover something interesting about your date, and something exciting about yourself.
Once you pick a topic of conversation, stick to it. If your date lists more than three members of a set, politely ask them to complete the set. You’ll demonstrate interest and a thorough character. It also becomes easier to jump in and guess what your partner will say.
Be aware of your body. Smile with teeth often. Mimic your date’s motions exactly, but not if they go to the bathroom! If that happens, ask yourself and those around you if the date is going well. If you don’t want to continue the date, you are under no obligation to stay. If you abandon, be polite and leave a note.
Avoid contentious issues, like who is paying for the date. Avoid touching the check or looking at the check for as long as possible. If you have no money, stop dating until you accrue wealth. Respect yourself by having priorities, and the respect of others will follow.After a successful date, you might consider kissing. The 1960s have come and gone, and casual kissing is no longer a smart way to start a relationship. If your partner seems interested in kissing, confidently explain that you fear sexually transmitted diseases. Anyone who loves you will understand.
John Gramila
A Midwestern boy with a big beard and plenty of time. I make music with The Pleasure Centers and always dance to cheap punk.
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